"One more time! Why were you flying over the White House?"


"Do you have anything that offers a certain equanimity toward the world's great religions, a touch of moral certitude but with a hint of emancipation from the Great Satan in 52 short?"



"Picture ID, please."


"Why it's New York!"


"For Christmas, Santy, I want to acquire all my competitors and have the biggest IPO on Wall Street."



"As you can see gentlemen, all indications point to a drop in orders this year."




"...and I want a file, a shovel and a hundred feet of strong rope."


"Now let's see, who's been naughty and who's been nice?"


"I have trouble saying no."


"What do you mean I don't own Santa.com?"